There are likely ___ reasons that you can’t quit porn. We have spoken with thousands of individuals who struggle to quit pornography, and here are some of the most common reasons they have shared.
You are dealing with an addiction.
Yes, watching pornography is a spiritual issue, especially for Christians. It involves lust and many other sins. But there are also neurochemical effects of pornography on the brain. After repeated exposure, your brain and body start to crave pornography. It feels like a physical need, even though it’s not. Brain scans even show the brains of porn users often resemble the brains of substance abusers.
This physical/neurological component to pornography makes it extremely difficult to overcome.
You need to tell someone about it.
Pornography addiction thrives in secrecy. Christians are particularly susceptible to secret porn struggles because we often feel so much guilt and shame. We don’t want others to know what we’ve done and what we’re dealing with.
Psalm 32:3 describes the feeling of many Christians struggling with porn: “When I kept silent, my bones became brittle
from my groaning all day long.”
There’s tremendous freedom to be found through transparency.
You haven’t fully admitted the problem.
This goes hand-in-hand with the previous point. 12-step groups understand the importance of this, and that’s why it’s always their first step: admit you have a problem that you can’t control.
If you’re struggling to quit porn, you have to admit the problem has gotten out of control, and you need outside help. It’s like your house is on fire, but instead of calling the fire department, you’re rearranging the furniture to block the flames. But you can only manage the problem for so long, this isn’t a solution.
You need to learn your triggers.
Triggers are those situations, events, and feelings that set you up for a fall. Often, we’re oblivious to them. And yet, if we can reverse engineer our triggers, we find a road-map for overcoming temptation.
Too many people just beat themselves up when they have a slip-up or fall. And yet these are prime opportunities for understanding your path to victory. Instead of getting hung up on the failure, think about the circumstances leading up to it.
- What was I thinking?
- What was I feeling?
- What was I doing?
You need counseling.
Counseling isn’t some magic pill that will set you free from an addiction. But speaking with an experienced Christian counselor can help you better understand yourself, the path you’ve been on, the wounds from your past that led to your addiction, and the steps you need to take to break free.
Too many Christians feel like it’s weak or shameful to seek out this kind of help. But many who have taken this path will testify to how helpful it can be.